Redefining Yourself Through Motherhood Series: Part 2, Chapter 7

By the time I started my Shaklee business, I felt more confident leaving my house with baby in tow.  She was now around 3 months old.  I still hadn't lost the baby weight I had gained, couldn't fit into pre-baby clothes and had little motivation to hit the gym too terribly hard.  A few of my friends had already lost ALL of their weight!  This worried me.  Would I ever feel sexy again?  What would I do with all of those clothes in my closet? 

Since so many of my friends had not met Brighton, the fact that I had started a network marketing business was a great opportunity for me to reconnect with friends over coffee or lunch during the day.  I could also let them know about my new business venture.  I started noticing that making one small change was beginning to make a big difference.  The change I made was getting out of the house and interacting with adults again.  At this point, I still had no idea what it meant to be in the "sales" industry, but I was happy to be doing something other than taking care of a baby all day - I was doing something for myself and it was having a positive impact.

Lunch after lunch I was not getting a huge response to my new business.  My husband started to think that I did nothing all day except go out to lunch with friends.  At least I was getting human interaction tough!  And this started rebuilding my confidence.  I felt more energized, more connected with people and I was beginning to see glimpses of my old self again.  I really dove in head first with my Shaklee business - I watched videos, had coaching calls, read about every product, wrote scripts and attended meetings.  What I realized about myself, however, was that I felt like I had to be an expert on all things health related before I could share the Shaklee products with anyone.  This made me nervous and I became fearful of sharing Shaklee with others.  What I NOW know is that having all the answers BEFORE getting started is not necessary.  I began to realize, slowly, that I would learn as I go. I could say all the wrong things, but if it was to the right person, it didn't matter.  I was making small discoveries and changes in myself as a person and as a business owner.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew that I was preparing myself for major future opportunities, I just didn't know what at this point.

Lesson Learned #7:  Become a DREAMER again.  My dream, at first, was to earn my own money as a business owner so that I could raise Brighton in our home.  Knowing HOW you'll reach your dreams is obsolete, it doesn't matter.  Know your WHY and create the first few baby steps to get started.  You'll meet people along the way, learn along the way, read along the way and figure it out.  Set out to discover you true purpose in life.  If you are struggling with being a full time stay at home Mom then maybe that isn't your purpose. Doesn't mean you're a bad Mom, it just means that you were called to serve in another way, in ADDITION to being a Mom.

Stay Tuned!  I invite you to stop by and become a reader of this series as it develops and morphs just like we as mothers develop and morph into thriving, successful women of abundance!  I don't know where this series is going to take me, but I do have a mission.

Megan

Redefining Yourself Through Motherhood Series: Part 1, Chapter 6

I went from Stay at Home Mom to Work From Home Mom in one afternoon conversation.  I didn't really have any expectations about my business, but I was very intrigued by the possibilities of traveling to exotic destinations for free and earning a monthly car payment simply for sharing an opportunity and the most fabulous nutritional products with others.  My business was in direct sales, one of the fastest growing careers for women right now.  Many women are deciding to forgo daycare and the 9 to 5 job to stay at home and raise their own children.  Donald Trump himself has said on national television in an interview that if he had to do it all over again he would choose Network Marketing to make his millions.

The direct sales business is a very supportive environment with tons of training, support, coaching, guidance, meetings, professional development, workshops and more.  I went full tilt into my business the minute I started.  Well, I went full tilt into studying, researching and feeling like I needed to become an expert on all things health and wellness before I actually shared the products or the opportunity with anyone.  What I've learned is that it isn't necessary to have all of the answers before you start any new venture.  Just go!  And, learn as you go.  If you're passionate about what you're doing and your passionate about the people you are serving then everything will fall into place.

Juggling a 3 month old and a new business was pretty easy, at first.  Brighton was taking two really long naps a day so I had about 5 hours to myself throughout the day to focus on my business five days a week.  I learned that putting systems in place for follow up, goal setting and mail outs was very helpful - it kept me focused, organized and on track for business growth.  But still, I was very green at the whole network marketing business and what it really meant to run a business.  Now I know why so many people fail - they treat their businesses like a hobby.  So began my second journey down an unfamiliar path - motherhood and entrepreneurship.  Combine those together and you've got some figuring out to do real quick!

Lesson Learned #6:  Find something to do during your "free" time if you are a stay at home Mom.  And I don't mean cook and clean.  Take some time to discover what you are truly passionate about and how you can incorporate that into your new life.  Becoming a stay at home Mom can cause you to feel as though you've lost your identity, that you're not ever going to be good enough at anything ever again except motherly and household duties.  Use motherhood as a time to discover what else is out there and start reaching for it! 

Please join me later this week as I dive into my emotional roller coaster as a new business owner.

Stay Tuned!  I invite you to stop by and become a reader of this series as it develops and morphs just like we as mothers develop and morph into thriving, successful women of abundance!  I don't know where this series is going to take me, but I do have a mission.

Megan

Redefining Yourself Through Motherhood Series: Part 1, Chapter 5

I was a former classroom teacher turned Mommy - 3 months in, I'm a business owner.  I didn't really know what that meant.  I did have a Bachelor of Science degree in Business Management, but I had never taken a class on entrepreneurship.  My career background was in teaching - yes, I ran a classroom but a school is so distant from the real world that when you get launched back into society you discover a world that you had no idea existed.  A world of adults!  Who would have thought!  A world where people are working for themselves, networking and building adult and business relationships, making the money they want to make, affecting thousands of lives.  There is so much energy outside of a school building - I didn't know how I was going to figure out this new role - all while taking care of a 3 month old 24/7.

For me, a public school atmosphere became very toxic.  It's one of the most physically, emotionally and mentally draining places to work.  We hear so many negative comments about the state of our education system here in the US and we're blaming our teachers.  They are only a small piece of the destruction.  Public education does not attract lazy, mean, negative people - education grows lazy, mean, negative people.  I remember walking through the empty hallway up to the office during my planning period and I would pass another teacher going in the opposite direction - they would look down at their feet as they passed by and not even make eye contact, no wave, no hello.  What kind of environment is that!!??!!  I could understand that coming from a native New Yorker walking down Wall Street, but in a school building?  Being a teacher can become very all consuming.  Stacks of papers to grade at home each night, extensive lesson plans to create and elaborate activities to facilitate each day. My husband wondered where he was going to fit into this picture.  If you're good at what you do in a classroom you end up becoming the "Yes Man".  You are asked to be in charge of new groups because the principal knows you can get it done and you want to get a good evaluation so you always say "Yes".  In fact, in order to get a good evaluation these days, you have to be in charge of at least two organizations/groups/clubs/teams within the school.

My life revolved around teaching.  Looking back - I was not happy. 

Having a child and becoming a stay at home Mom for me was a blessing in disguise.  So far you've read that Mommyhood for me was not a bed of roses and I'm not out of the woods yet - there's more.  I never ever would have entertained the idea of starting my own business if I did not have Brighton and make the decision to quit my full time J-O-B.

My goal for writing this series is to empower every woman out there to dig deep inside of herself, explore the millions of options the world has to offer and to make her mark.  Becoming a stay at home Mom opens it's doors to endless possibilities if you are willing to open yourself up to receiving those possibilities.  Without Brighton, I would still be in a classroom today and I would be in a classroom until retirement.  I would have lived on okay life.  I would still be going through the motions.  I would have shortchanged my marriage.  I would have stayed inside of my comfort zone.  I would not have found the many blessings outside of my comfort zone.  I would not have changed.  I would not have met the most amazing people that I have met.  I would have seen the world in a different, more closed minded light.  I would not have learned what I've learned about people and how to effectively communication with them.  I would still be judging others. 

Becoming a stay at home Mom changed the world for me.  Opening myself up to the possibility of receiving the gifts of owning my own business changed my world.  And now I am here to change your world.

Please join me later this week as I dive into what it was like to start my first business!

Lesson Learned #5:  Give yourself permission to dream.  There is so much more to this short life than what we've been taught to think and do.  Open yourself up to receiving your dreams and you will be blessed beyond belief.

Stay Tuned!  I invite you to stop by and become a reader of this series as it develops and morphs just like we as mothers develop and morph into thriving, successful women of abundance!  I don't know where this series is going to take me, but I do have a mission.

Megan

Redifining Yourself Through Motherhood Series: Part 1, Chapter 4

If I sleep, then I won't have to deal with a lack of confidence, internal struggle, getting back into shape or redefining myself through motherhood. For quite a while, all I wanted to do was stay in my pj's and sleep or lay around - maybe clean a pot or a pan, sweep the floor or fold a few pieces of laundry.  I remember not even wanting to appear in the grocery store - for whatever reason, that trip seemed so difficult at times.  What would I buy?  What would we eat for dinner each week?  Would I have to cook since I'm home all day?  I reached a point while being a stay at home Mom where I felt incapable of making decisions, incapable or getting back into the gym, undeserving of the beautiful gifts the universe has to offer, and unworthy of sharing my own gifts with the world.  Why?

So many women that I've spoken to over the past 17 months can relate to this feeling that I call an identity crisis.  I went from working 70 hours a week, in charge of so many things at my school and was viewed as a countywide leader in my field of expertise to being a stay at home Mom whose job was to feed a baby, clean a house, cook meals, change diapers, run a few errands here and there and watch a baby sleep the day away.  I didn't know who I was anymore because I was no longer stimulating myself, I was no longer interacting with intelligent adults, I was no longer making a positive impact on the lives of others.  I literally felt like I was getting stupid - I guess that's what we call the post pregnancy brain.

I started seeing my friends going back to work once their babies hit 3 and 4 months and in a way I was jealous.  I knew I didn't want to go back to the classroom, but I was jealous that these women were giving themselves a chance to live their lives as individuals in addition to serving as a mother to their child(ren).  And these women once again became contributing members of society.  Isn't that what we all want?  To give back?  Of course we all like receiving, but isn't it more gratifying to give?

So, I started a business.  Yes, this incapable, no confidence, going through an identity crisis new Mom was starting a business.

Come back in a few days for my next chapter to learn more about my journey back into the world of work!

Lesson Learned #4:  Create a set schedule and stick to it.  Give yourself some "me" time.  I always waited until Brighton woke me up before I would get out of bed.  And sometimes, I would put her back to bed so that I could continue my slumber.  Wake up an hour before baby usually rises and take a hot shower, put your make up on and put on something that makes you feel good.  Choose an errand to run each day so that you get out of the house.  This gives you the opportunity to interact with adults in the real world and make decisions while on your trip.  If you are now in charge of cleaning house and that seems overwhelming, clean one room a day or tackle one cleaning project a day.  Schedule it out for the week!

Stay Tuned!  I invite you to stop by and become a reader of this series as it develops and morphs just like we as mothers develop and morph into thriving, successful women of abundance!  I don't know where this series is going to take me, but I do have a mission.

Megan

Redifining Yourself Through Motherhood Series: Part 1, Chapter 3

About a month into my SAHM journey I realized that I was spending an awful lot of time inside my home with a baby that slept, pooped, ate, slept, pooped, slept, slept, ate, ate, ate and slept some more.  I was alone.  What better way to get out of the house than by starting my own Mom Group!  I'm a natural born leader so this was right up my alley. I knew a handful of women who had either just had a baby or had a young child and we were all within a 10 minute radius of one another.  I picked a park, I picked the people, I picked the day and the time.  And.....we're off!
What a fabulous chance to interact with other Moms facing the same hardships, milestones and celebrations - we were all in this together and blind as bats.  I remember feeling part of something and I did it like it was everything.  I looked forward to seeing these women, getting out of the house and exerting some energy outdoors each week.  The sad part came when everyone but me went back to work in December.  Once again, I was alone.  This wonderful group had just taken flight and was increasing speed and altitude as we could see the runway in the distance.  Then the engines blew.  I was the pilot and didn't land so gracefully in the Hudson.  There was nothing that I could do to salvage the group.  Some of the kids had in home nannies and others went to daycare while Mom ventured back into the world of work - surrounded by people, intellect, energy, conversation and adults.  The saddest part is that once we all scattered in different directions I kind of lost touch with them all.

Back at home.  Poop.  Eat.  Sleep.  Poop.  Eat.  Sleep.  Alone.  Maybe this stay at home Mom thing wasn't all it was cracked up to be?

Lesson Learned #3:  Become the pilot!!  Start a Mom group if you feel alone and disconnected from the world of adult normalcy.  There are so many Moms out there salivating for companionship during this precious, yet tough time in their lives.  You can easily start a group and advertise it on Meetup.com or call up a few friends in the area with babies.  Don't know your neighbors but you saw a stork sitting in their front lawn a month ago? Go knock on their door - I bet that Mom would be more than happy to whip out her stroller and head down the street for a stroll.

Stay Tuned!  I invite you to stop by and become a reader of this series as it develops and morphs just like we as mothers develop and morph into thriving, successful women of abundance!  I don't know where this series is going to take me, but I do have a mission.

Megan